#06 When things elude us in life

LTDL #06, Go to Puerto Rico for my 30th birthday. Well, this didn’t happen. I guess a part of me knew when I started this bucket list that it might not. It’s hard to believe that was around 4 years ago now.

Remember those times when you ask yourself, or maybe that friend you’re sitting with over mixed drinks at the bar: what do you think you’ll be doing in around 5 years?

Well, here I am. Pretty close to those 5 years later, when that younger me was scribbling numbers, letters, and a doodle or two into my hot pink Moleskin mini notebook.

Back then when I started it I took it everywhere. It traveled back and forth around New Jersey, and even came to New York City with me on a few occasions.

Sometimes I would accidentally write in the same thing twice. I guess that must mean I really want to do it, huh?

Sometimes, I’d write things in there too much on a whim; emotions can easily sway your thoughts. Hey, I’m only human.

I wasn’t even positive I’d really knock anything off. But then again, not everything on there ended up being huge feats of life-changing challenges or events. Some are tiny. Significant more to me, in that minute of my life, than to the eyes of a stranger.

For this number, the vacation I had spent in Puerto Rico with some friends had been one of my favorite memories. At the time I started this bucket list in 2010, I really wanted to go back some day. I had always imagined doing this big thing for my 30th birthday. Go all out. And it seemed reasonable that in a few years I could save some money here and there and go there in celebration–hopefully with a friend or two.

Ah, but how time slips by without you even blinking. We all say that. I think sometimes we say that and just become complacent to it. Time is the one enemy we cannot defeat, and so we just allow it to consume our years.

My 30th birthday was not spent in Puerto Rico. But you know, that’s OK. It was spent instead in Atlantic City, New Jersey. My friends were there, and even though I had dreamed of something different it was a blast. That’s all I really wanted, anyhow. To have a really fun time with my friends.

This number will never be taken off the list. I cannot scratch it out, and I’m already 6 months older. Another year will pass by before I know it. But that’s not the end to it. A new number will be added: go back to Puerto Rico.

One day, I’ll cross that one off.


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