I’m supposed to be sitting on a train right now. I’m supposed to be my way to NYC. Today was supposed to be really fun. But instead I’m right back at my house, because no matter what I can’t seem to get things right. I can’t seem to ever be able to get organized and be on time for things. So down right now.
So disappointed with my inability to be better, to do better. Why can’t I just not be this way? It’s not missing out on part of my plans that bothers me. It’s more wanting to change the parts of my life that I don’t like. The bad habits or problems I have and fix them. I know it’s partially because of the ADD, but I don’t want that to be excuse to not try harder. Sometimes, though, it gets so frustrating.
I know I have to just take a deep breath, and focus. This blog is almost like a deep breath. I breath into it some of my emotions, and feel a little more calm.